I Will Never...

Thursday, April 28, 2016
Did you read Sue's post yesterday "WOW! Women On Writing Blog: Editor: Ally or Adversary?" It began with the following quote: “After that experience, I’m never working with an editor again. It’s strictly self-publishing for me.” This reminded me of a recent conversation with a fellow mom. In retrospect I feel really silly for all the times in life I've uttered the words "I Will Never...". The list is quite lengthy and most of these were expressed in my youth:

- I will never drive a minivan
- I will never spank my children
- I will never wear yoga pants in public
- I will never bribe my children to behave in the grocery store

The list goes on, and I'm sure you've got a list of your own. I couldn't picture myself driving a minivan, but then again I couldn't have known I would have four children. Now I'm a minivan mama and I love the extra room, the DVD player, and the sliding side doors. It has really simplified my life. Same thing with spanking. I happen to have one particular child who is strong willed. She has received a spanking or two in her lifetime and she is better for it. When I was sixteen-years-old I had no way of knowing what type of child I would have, much less what type of parenting style I'd have to adopt in order to raise said child. As for the yoga pants in public, I've seen worse, and at this stage in the game I'll choose form over fashion any day and crawling on the floor playing Legos is much more comfortable in yoga pants. Bribery in the grocery store is a different story. I never bribe my children to behave in the grocery store--and if you believe that, I've got a bridge to sell you. I have four children, so on a good day, one of them will have some sort of meltdown or temper tantrum in the cereal aisle. On a bad day, they'll ALL have a meltdown. I've often bought the Cookie Crisp or promised them a trip to the park if they'll just let me get out of the store with my groceries.

My reality looks far different than the picture I painted in my head when I was young and naive. I've learned to take a step back and look at the situation without judgment. I feel I'm a better person because of the lessons life has taught me. Now, how does this apply to my writing life? Publishing a book is a lot like picking out a great pair of jeans and instead of saying "I will never..." I think it's important to try on a few different pairs of jeans before deciding what you do and don't want. Same thing with writing and publishing. Those of you who have said "I will never self publish" may just want to brush up on the topic. You may find a self-publishing platform that is just right for you, or you may find a publishing firm that is such a good fit you couldn't imagine publishing any other way.

We evolve with time. I remember my daddy saying "I will never pay more than $1 for a gallon of gasoline" and I wonder what he would be doing today. He actually never did pay more than a dollar, because he passed away before fuel prices got silly. Chances are, if he were still around, he would gladly pay $1.87 per gallon if it meant being able to visit his grandchildren.

The moral of the story is this: We change over time. Technology changes of time. If we aren't open to learning about something different, we are limiting ourselves.

This can be applied to our parenting, our marriage, our writing, and our career. Do you have an "I will never ___________" story to share? Leave it in the comments and we can giggle together! Thank you as always for taking a moment to read my post. I hope it made you smile, and gave you a little different perspective.


Crystal is a church musician, babywearing mama (aka crunchy mama), business owner, active journaler, writer and blogger, Blog Tour Manager with WOW! Women on Writing, Publicist with Dream of Things Publishing, as well as a dairy farmer. She lives in Manitowoc County, Wisconsin with her husband, four young children (Carmen 9, Andre 7, Breccan 2, and Delphine 1), two dogs, two rabbits, four little piggies, a handful of cats and kittens, and over 230 Holsteins.

You can find Crystal riding unicorns, taking the ordinary and giving it a little extra (making it extraordinary), blogging and reviewing books, baby carriers, cloth diapers, and all sorts of other stuff at: http://bringonlemons.blogspot.com/ and here: http://muffin.wow-womenonwriting.com/


Sue Bradford Edwards said...

Although it wasn't recorded, I may have said (ahem) I will never do work for hire. Let's see -- 5 books out (work for hire), two more completed and ready for release (work for hire), and yet two more in the works. Can you say it with me? Also work for hire. Obviously, my much younger self may have been a bit short-sighted.

Sheila Good said...

I probably said the same thing many daughters say at one point in their lives. "I will never act like my mother." HaHaHa, I can almost remember the day when it happened. I was stunned. "did I just say that?" As I get older, I see more and more of her looking back in the mirror. Life changes, circumstances change and after all these years, I've learned to never say never! Thanks for sharing. @sheilamgood at Cow Pasture Chronicles

iamagemcrystal said...

Oh so many times we are short sighted. Thanks for sharing ladies! I also am guilty of many of my mothers habits...and it makes me smile. My younger self would never believe it!


Cher'ley said...

I always say, "Never say never." I try not to ever say that or even think it. Cher'ley

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