Friday Speak Out!: Are You a Writer?

Friday, August 18, 2017
by Mary-Lane Kamberg

Are you just embarking on the writer’s journey and feel reluctant to call yourself a “real” writer? Don’t be intimidated to declare yourself a member of the tribe. Take heart, fellow traveler. Check off the items that apply to you on following list. The more you check off, the better creds you have. However, even if you check only the last one, you’re in. You are a writer.

You might be a writer if:

· You find a grammatical error in a New York Times best seller and think, I can do better than that!

· You miss your exit on the Interstate because you’re working out the next plot twist for your novel.

· You hear “last call” at the library.

· You eavesdrop in a restaurant and think, I’m gonna use that!

· You thrive on conflict.

· On an airplane a flight attendant tells you to turn off electronic devices, and you close the hardcover book you’re reading.

· You love office supplies.

· You hear “last call” at Barnes and Noble.

· Sitting behind home plate at a Major League Baseball game, you see a pitch coming right at you until the protective netting catches it. You think, so that’s what it’s like to see a fast ball screaming toward your head. I’m gonna use that!

· You go to Chipotle to read the cups.

· You think pajamas qualify as “business casual.”

· You procrastinate until the last possible minute and still meet your deadline.

· You’re addicted to adrenaline.

· You have unread books stacked all over the house.

· You hear “last call” at Starbucks.

· Your favorite friends are other writers.

· Your only friends are other writers.

· You might have a friend who is an artist or musician.

· You walk into a plate glass window and think, so that’s what it feels like to get punched in the nose. I’m gonna use that!

· You tell your spouse to stop creeping up behind you and reading over your shoulder.

· You hear “last call” at Staples.

· You pick up a cereal box and turn to the back just to have something to read.

· You meet someone with an unusual name and think, I’m gonna use that!

· Your cat walks across your computer keyboard. You interrupt your writing session to feed her.

· You look up from a late night writing session and see the sun and hear birds singing.

· You people-watch from a corner at Whole Foods.

· You think of an idea for a poem, story, novel, essay, article or book and think, I’m gonna use that! And you do.

* * *
Mary-Lane Kamberg is a professional writer/editor/speaker in the Kansas City area. She is the author of more than 30 books, including The I Love To Write Book: Ideas and Tips for Young Writers and The "I Don't Know How to Cook" Book. She writes nonfiction books for middle school and high school libraries and has published a poetry chapbook Seed Rain. She roots for the Jayhawks during March Madness.
Would you like to participate in Friday "Speak Out!"? Email your short posts (under 500 words) about women and writing to: marcia[at]wow-womenonwriting[dot]com for consideration. We look forward to hearing from you!


Sioux Roslawski said...

Mary-Lane--Too often we find ourselves too serious when we speak of our writing work. Thanks for reminding us of the whimsical side.

Laughter is almost always good...

Margo Dill said...

HAHAHAHAHA! Mary-Lane: these are great. I especially love the "last call at Barnes and Noble." SO good to see you hear as a Friday Speak Out poster. :)

Angela Mackintosh said...

This list is so fun! I found myself nodding my head to a lot of these. Business casual, guilty! LOL Thanks for the post!

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