Friday Speak Out!: Not a Nice Little Hobby

by Jeaninne Escallier Kato

I recently sent my memoir manuscript, “B.J.’s Promise,” to a childhood friend. After weeks of waiting for her critique, she called me to say, “I could actually see and feel your relationship with B.J., the dog I remember changing your life. Your writing is such a nice little hobby.” I was so taken aback by her response, nice little hobby, I had no response. This is from a woman who bought my children’s book, Manuel’s Murals, for her grandchildren, who cheered for me when I won a flash fiction contest, and who has followed my writing path with other publications since we were young adults.

Other friends suggested she was jealous of my talent, or didn’t want to give it the credit it’s due for whatever reasons; but for me, it was symbolic of a bigger picture. This particular friend didn’t mean any harm, she probably didn’t even realize the impact of her words. Not being a writer herself, how could she know what words mean to me? Which brings me to the existential question of why I write, why any of us write. I have thought long and hard about this; I feel deeply compelled to share my thoughts here in this newsletter with other writers.

I know why the word ‘hobby’ stung so deeply. My writing is an extension of who I am, it is an account of my existence on this planet. I don’t consider the people and experiences of my life as hobbies, as if they are ancillary to the meaning of my life or a way to pass the time in between what matters. My writing is a way to encapsulate all the experiences, in one form or another, with the people, pets, places I have loved, known and encountered because that is everything to me. It is my way to rejoice every aspect my life, for good or bad.

Dancers dance, painters paint, actors act. They do it because it is what they were born to do. They do it because parts of them would die if they didn’t. Isn’t that why we write? Our stories may not be exactly as we have lived them, but when we create new stories, we are exercising the needs and drives of every electrical current in our brains. We are honoring how we are wired. We are honoring who we are.

My writing isn’t just for me. I write to inspire, to educate, to support, to soothe, and yes, to even challenge my reader. Any movie that has ever impacted my life came from a writer. Any book that affected me as a child sparked the course of my life. My best works have been written to enlighten the reader to new cultures, hopefully, to minimize prejudice and racial divide in these divisive times.

Having said all that, I need to give myself permission to say, “No, writing isn’t a fun little hobby; it is what I was born to do.” Don’t you agree?

* * * 

Jeaninne Escallier Kato is a retired educator who finds her writing muse in the Mexican culture. She is the author of the noted children's book, Manuel's Murals http://manuelsmurals-blog.tumblr.com. Jeaninne is a WOW flash fiction 2017 winner for her story, "A Desert Rose." She is published in two Chicken Soup for the Soul anthologies, has stories in several online literary magazines, and her essay, "Swimming Lessons" is featured in the coffee table anthology, Gifts From Our Grandmothers. Jeaninne is in the process of publishing her memoir, B.J.'s Promise.
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Would you like to participate in Friday "Speak Out!"? Email your short posts (under 500 words) about women and writing to: marcia[at]wow-womenonwriting[dot]com for consideration. We look forward to hearing from you!
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5 comments Friday Speak Out, Jeaninne Escallier Kato, people who don't understand, why I write

This is Writing

This week, I had my writing center students complete an assignment based off the essay series called “This is Childhood.” In the series, bloggers for the Huffington Post reflect on what the various ages of childhood look like to them. This series inspired another blog, where author Emily Mendell muses about being 45 years old.

I have yet to see my students’ finished products, but it got me thinking about what my age says about me and, more specifically, where I am in life as a writer. It's long, but it's worth it.  So here it is:

This is writing for ten years.

Writing for ten years is remembering the delight of crafting your first novel. Each word - each page - was a step towards greatness. Your enthusiasm was at an epic height. You envisioned the literary agent of your dreams, a Random House publishing contract, and a billion-dollar movie deal. Writing wasn’t work, then.

Writing for ten years is accepting that the “first novel” magic is gone. You left it behind - perhaps on the same thumb drive where your novel now makes its sweet repose. You never access that file anymore. It’s a reminder of your “youth” when adverbs and dialogue dominated your writing. It’s cringing at the word count of your first novel - above 120,000 words - which is a major faux pas in the writing world. It’s regretting the name of your main character, because its a name you’d like to use in a different book, but it seems cruel to rip it away from your first “baby.”

Writing for ten years is understanding you’re no longer a fledgling but are far from accomplished. You’re an average, everyday sort of writer. You think about writing all the time, but put it off for your children’s after-school activities. For cooking and cleaning. For trips to the grocery store and Target and the doctor’s office. For grading papers and planning lessons. For family obligations. For calming down a hormonal teenager who is having her fourth minor crisis of the day and for the rare time you can go for a 30 minute run outside. You put it off for ten, quiet minutes on the couch without someone calling your name or needing something.

Writing for ten years means having a list of story ideas on your phone. You probably don’t understand half of them anymore, because they were written in the middle of the night or after that third glass of wine. It’s listening to a song on the radio and picturing a vivid scene for your book. It’s replaying that same song ad nauseum until the scene is solidified in your mind because you’re driving, and you don’t have the capability of writing it down.

Writing for ten years means finding that precious hour to work on your current novel, only to spend that hour going back and re-reading in an attempt to rediscover your intended path. You fix problem after problem along the way. Sometimes you discover an excellent scene and congratulate yourself. At the end of the hour, you’ve written, perhaps, for ten minutes, before you are called away on another errand.

Writing for ten years means letting go of the strict grammar conventions of high school and recognizing that style, complex characters, and rich settings are of paramount importance. It’s okay to break the rules, because it creates depth.

After writing for ten years, you cling to the hope that your writing is worthy of an agent. You’ve sent out over one hundred query letters. You also recognize - with painful acquiescence - you may never land one.

It’s finally getting published by a small press and loving every minute of the publishing process. It’s jumping up and down when you receive the acceptance email. It’s spending grueling hours in front of a computer screen making all of your verbs active and removing the word “look” from your manuscript 300 times. It’s delighting in the cover art and sharing your accomplishments with anyone who will listen.

Writing for ten years is realizing, a year after you’ve been published, that book promotion is the most difficult part of the publishing process. It’s getting royalty statements with “0” next to “books sold.” It’s fighting the urge to give up.

After writing for ten years, you are aware of your responsibilities as a writer. You write as much for your audience - for that one person who might connect with your work - as you do for yourself.

Writing for ten years means embracing the joys and the rejection that come with writing. You acknowledge that you will not be the next Stephen King or Joyce Carol Oates. You accept that you will, most likely, never be able to quit your day job.

Writing for ten years means you love the craft. That never goes away. You know you will always be a writer. Especially because your license plate says "WR1TE."

This is writing for ten years. This is me.


Bethany Masone Harar is an author, teacher, and blogger, who does her best to turn reluctant readers into voracious, book-reading nerds. Check out her blog here and her website here.

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5 comments author, Bethany Masone Harar, blog, Emily Mendell, This is 45, This is Childhood, This is Writing, why I write, writing

Friday Speak Out!: Why I Write

by Melanie Olsen

One morning last week I sat in the car with my high schooler and waited for the school bus. The stop is at the bottom of our street, he could easily walk, but it gives us a few minutes to sit and talk. When the bus pulled up I reached over and grabbed his hand, and I held on just a little longer than usual.

“Mom, the bus is here.”

“I know. I love you, have a good day.”

Please. Please know how much I love you. Please be strong. Please be safe.

I came back to the house, poured a cup of coffee, and sat down at my computer. I have work to do, bills to pay, but instead, I write.

I write to face the fear. To share it. To know that I am not alone.

I write because when I kiss the cheek of my pre-teen as I tuck her in at night, I close my eyes and still feel the soft round cheek of a toddler, and I say a prayer for the strong young lady she is becoming. These words are for her, so she hears my hopes and fears, and for me too, to always keep these moments close.

It’s what we do, those of us who are blessed, and sometimes haunted, by the words that hang in our mind until we cut them loose onto a page. For so many years I was too self-conscious to share my thoughts and stories. If the words were funny I felt silly, if they were sad, I felt vulnerable. But how does anything great ever happen if we never feel silly or vulnerable?

I write to never forget the feel of a soft flannel shirt against my face when I hugged my Dad.

We write to hold onto the memories, to never let go of the best times, and to never forget the hard times, because those times make up our stories too.

I write to cherish the feel of the sun on my back and dirt on my hands when I sit and plant flowers with my Mom, to look back on words of wisdom, and the certainty of knowing just where I came from.

All these pieces make our stories, and all these stories make us who we are. May we be blessed enough that when we share our words we create a laugh, a tear, or a thought to ponder. And may the only thing left forgotten be the self-consciousness that almost kept us from writing.

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Melanie Olsen is a *mostly* humor writer. She is happiest when she’s with her family, writing, or travelling. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband, son, daughter, dog, guinea pig, and bearded dragon; There’s never a shortage of comedy material and she can be can be followed at https://melanieolsen.me/ or on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/vagabondprogeny/
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Would you like to participate in Friday "Speak Out!"? Email your short posts (under 500 words) about women and writing to: marcia[at]wow-womenonwriting[dot]com for consideration. We look forward to hearing from you!
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5 comments Friday Speak Out, Melanie Olsen, why I write, writer inspiration

Friday Speak Out!: The Joy of Writing, guest post by Katie Martin

The Joy of Writing
by Katie Martin

One day last week, I went to the mailbox and found four letters from various publications. I ended up with one "yes,"one "maybe," and two "no's."

The "yes" is a short story (non-fiction) that will be published in November. Both "no's" were no's, but they each contained comments on my work. I will study them and see if I can use them to improve my writing.

A "maybe" is a different story. It may be three months, six months or even years before I know whether the answer is yes or no. Still, I know I am on my way now. Each day brings new hope for my future as a writer.

Although I don't always understand the "no's," I realize they are a part of my writing. So, I try to accept them and go on.

 I am lucky because I have a cheering section. This group of people always knows what to say. They encourage me to continue writing. There are kind words when the rejections get overwhelming. Even more important, they listen to the same piece--time after time, day after day--as I attempt to fine tune it into a publishable article or manuscript. Maybe I should call this cheering section "my victims." Even though I talk humorously about this group of people, it is an important part of every writer's life.

My hope, like others, is always for a regular income from writing. It does seem like there is interest, and the money always comes in spurts.

 I had a friend who wrote for a living. She always spoke of how writing and its income came in spurts. Her children used to talk about her writing income. "When mommy gets rich," they would say, and then go on to talk about what they would do with the extra income.

One of my greatest problems is patience. Once I have finished a piece, I want an immediate response. Instead it may be months, or even longer, before I hear.

I have to remind myself how much I have always wanted to write. I go back and reread an earlier piece, and one I have written this week. It makes me realize how far I have come.

When all is said and done, I know this is what I want to do. I am writing for the pure joy of writing, and look forward to tomorrow.

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A day in Katie Martin's life begins with a vigiilant eye and an open mind, to the many stories that lay behind the daily events of people, places and things. A well published writer, with an appetite for life, Katie brings a warm glow to everyday things....making them extraordinary.

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Would you like to participate in Friday "Speak Out!"? Email your short posts (under 500 words) about women and writing to: marcia[at]wow-womenonwriting[dot]com for consideration. We look forward to hearing from you!
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3 comments Friday Speak Out, joy, Katie Martin, why I write

Why Do We Write: Autonomy, Mastery, Purpose

I just received a quarterly royalty statement and it wasn't stellar. The money just isn't there. Why do I keep doing this, writing for kids and writing how-to-write articles and books? Why do we keep working in the face of surprisingly little money?

I've been reading DRIVE: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us by Daniel H. Pink. He says that business has traditionally been built on the idea of carrots and sticks. If you do well, we'll reward you (with money, fame, perks, etc), and if you do poorly, we'll punish you. Unfortunately, the carrots and sticks approach works best for routine jobs and only for those type jobs. Think assembly lines. For those jobs where you want something done exactly the same each time, where compliance to a strict method is important, use the rewards and punishments system.

Writing is seldom a routine job. Instead, for work like ours, Pink says we are motivated by three things: autonomy, mastery and purpose.

Writers certainly have autonomy. For fiction at least, we often write on spec, or the speculation that someone might like what we write. We determine the audience we will target, topics we'll discuss, the characters we'll create. We decide when we write, how we write and what editors/publishers we work with. Everything about a writing career is autonomous.

A second motivator is mastery, spending time to become an expert. When you are engaged in a subject, totally fascinated and you find that time stands still while you write, then you are working toward mastery. Pink describes this altered state as being in "the flow." In fact the best predictor of productivity is the desire for intellectual challenge, "the urge to master something new and engaging."

A sense of purpose is the final motivator and it's a powerful one. People who champion a cause are more likely to be engaged and to work with autonomy. Even brief reminders of a purpose behind your work is enough to increase productivity. My purposes revolve around two things: creating great literature for kids and helping other writers to reach their potential. When one of those purposes is activated in a piece of writing, I am willing to work harder--regardless of the results on that royalty statement.

Ours is a profession that thrives on autonomy, mastery and purpose. Do I want money? Yes! But oddly enough, Pink recommends business people provide adequate monetary incentive--make sure people can take care of their family and commitments. After that baseline is met, increasing pay doesn't increase productivity much; instead, an environment that encourages autonomy, mastery and purpose will increase productivity.

Why do I keep writing in the face of less-than-stellar royalty statement? Because I'm doing what I want, when I want; I am engaged and fascinated by this process of putting words on the page; and I do it for the kids and for other writers. I love my job. That's why I write.

Author and writing teacher Darcy Pattison blogs at Fiction Notes (www.darcypattison.com).

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11 comments autonomy, carrot stick, Darcy Pattison, Drive by Daniel Pink, mastery, money, motivation, purpose, why I write