Interview with Meredith Towbin, Runner Up in the WOW! 2021 Q1 Creative Nonfiction Contest
I'm Tellin'
As a child, my older sister and cousin often called me a tattletale. There I was in my plaits with ribbons on the ends of each one and white Ked sneakers, dingy from playing, running through whoever's house I was in to tell on them.
"Ooh I'm tellin'," I'd cover my mouth and yell, always leaving off the end letter g. Whether it was finding out my sister had a crush on a boy, or my cousin said the word, "Dang," which I thought was a curse word, or they kicked me out of their room, I was tellin' my parents or any other adult that was nearby on them.
I'm sure that irritated my sister and cousin to no end. I know it was most likely why they mumbled under their breath and frowned when they had to take me anywhere with them. Thankfully for them (and myself) that tattletale stage in my life was short lived.
When I outgrew my tattletale stage though, it seemed as if I stopped tellin' a lot of things altogether that I shouldn't have. If someone said or did something hurtful, I didn't tell. I didn't speak up for fear others would get upset. I chose silence instead. Even as an adult. Even when I wrote, which has always been my saving grace, I stopped tellin'. I kept those stories locked securely in my head instead of setting them free so they wouldn't lance my spirit.
Now...finally...because I am on a journey of writing without inhibitions, I am reverting back to being a tattletale. I'm showing my nakedness, sharing my beautiful mess; for what lies beneath all of our flawed layers is indeed beautiful. I'm tellin' those stories I've kept close to my bosom that have caused too many sleepless nights.
"I'm tellin'."
Recently I wrote an essay about a scar on my body from a surgery I had years ago that I submitted to a literary magazine. Whether or not it gets published, it felt cathartic in my tellin'. I'm embracing this new me, this self liberating/healing attitude of tellin' that has overtaken me. I'm gathering those notebooks in the bottom drawer of my bedroom dresser, where I housed stories I've never finished because my palms grew sweaty and my stomach queasy each time I tried to, and finishing them.
I'm tellin' those stories that are painful, and those stories that may ruffle feathers. I'm tellin' those stories about racism and how it affected me, my loved ones and my community. I'm tellin' those stories that will make readers see a part of themselves, a part they too may have stuffed away or muted, so they can start charting their own self-liberating journey. I'm tellin' more about me so that others can understand a bit more what my world looks like as a black woman.
I'm tellin' to bridge gaps and to connect my words with someone's heart. And no, not all of my stories will be steeped in nothing but melancholy. Many will make you laugh out loud, for some of the stories I stopped tellin' have moments of hilarity scattered throughout them.
So, I hope in whatever genre you write in, you too are in a tattletale mood. I hope you feel like tellin' all those stories that you once had second thoughts about tellin'. I hope you tell the stories that allow readers to sit on the edge of their emotions and see you threadbare so that they want to read more of your work, knowing that if you survived or bounced back, they can also. It's all in our tellin'.
"Im tellin'," and I hope you continue to do so also and give your voice, even the rawest parts of it, wings.
----Jeanine DeHoney
Jeanine DeHoney is a freelance writer who has had her writing published in several anthologies, magazines, and online blogs.
Friday Speak Out!: Why I Write
I write because I can’t not write.
Anyone who gets as wildly excited as I do when Staples has notebooks on sale for $.25 has to write. Finding my favorite pens makes me feel like a kid on Christmas morning.
Writing is part of who I am.
Recent events propelled me to revisit my dream of being a writer. Hoping to avoid my previous missteps, I signed up for a course offered by an experienced writing coach.
Before diving in, she encouraged me to explore these inquiries:
Why does writing matter to me?
Why do I feel compelled to write?
Writing matters to me because it is the primary way I care for myself. When I can’t find my footing, it grounds me. When I’m stuck, it sets me free. Without a writing practice, I'm lost. Wherever I am in the world, it brings me home.
Writing expands my self-awareness. Scribbling sentences sets a stage for emotions to safely speak. Journaling reveals invaluable insights and riveting revelations, celebrates joy and love, and sheds light on negative patterns and choices that may change them. These discoveries allow me to show up in the world as a better version of myself.
My coach invited me to dive deeper: Why do I want to share my writing? Particularly when the process of getting published can be excruciating.
I want to share because I believe in the power of words and their unmatched ability to uplift, encourage and empower.
I want to share to honor all the writers whose stories changed my life. Growing up, I felt different from those around me. It was words written by people I never met that made me feel seen and understood. Had these courageous authors chosen not to share, I don’t know where I would be right now.
I want to share because I am raising artists. I want to set a good example by experiencing all the emotions that accompany an artist’s journey. The exhilaration of accomplishment; the agony of unmet expectations and everything in between.
This inquisitive writing exercise has proved invaluable. My responses anchor me. ‘My whys’ tether me to my truth and hold me steady so I can stay the course as I navigate life as a writer.
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Anne Marie Scala is a freelance writer who has been published in the Elephant Journal, Scary Mommy and Her View From Home. She’s also an educator and community volunteer who appreciates a good book, a good run, and a good football game. Anne Marie lives in New Jersey with her husband and two teenage daughters. You can follow her on Instagram @ anne_marie_scala
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Would you like to participate in Friday "Speak Out!"? Email your short posts (under 500 words) about women and writing to: marcia[at]wow-womenonwriting[dot]com for consideration. We look forward to hearing from you!
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3 Reasons to Keep Writing
The presenter for the webinar was Liz Garton Scanlon and she recommended a long list of concept books. When they arrived, I eagerly sat down to read. I had to laugh after I finished One Dark Bird by Liz Garton Scanlon and Counting Crows by Kathi Appelt. Both are counting books about black birds.
I couldn’t help but wonder what Scanlon thought if she discovered Counting Crows (2015) while she was working on One Dark Bird (2019). The good news is that she both found publishers because they are very different books. There is room for both.
How often do we put an idea aside when we hear someone is working on something similar? What we need to do is keep writing and here is why.
Imaginary Dragons
Writing is tough enough without us creating imaginary problems. When you hear about a book in production that sounds like your own idea, a counting book about birds, it can be easy to become discouraged. "Someone beat me to it!" Maybe yes. Maybe no. If the piece hasn’t been published, you may be assuming it is too like your own work, because your work will be told through . . .Your POV
When you write, you tell the fiction or nonfiction story through your individual point of view (POV). No matter what you are writing it will somehow reflect your unique take on the world. That other author? Even siblings have different experiences and look at things differently. What is the chance that this author will see things just like you do? Pretty slim. So keep writing.
Reslant or Reimagine
If you can read the other writer’s work, do. Although it probably isn't very like your own idea, it may be. And if it is, you can reslant or reimagine your own work. A nonfiction picture book could become fiction. Or you might write it for older readers. A book for an educational publisher will be different than one written for a trade publisher or a regional publisher. A picture book? It may be fully illustrated but it is different from a graphic novel.
Whether you are writing a counting book, a book about birds, or even one about the Fibonacci sequence, there is almost always room for more than one book. You simply need to find your unique point of view and the piece that only you could write.
--SueBE
Sue Bradford Edwards' is the author of over 27 books for young readers. To find out more about her writing, visit her site and blog, One Writer's Journey.
Sue is also the instructor for Research: Prepping to Write Nonfiction for Children and Young Adults (next session begins March 1, 2021) and Writing Nonfiction for Children and Young Adults (next session begins March 1, 2021).
When Size Matters
Sometimes bigger is better. A bigger paycheck. A larger brownie (which results in a bigger butt, which is not a good thing). A bigger spot to parallel park into.
And sometimes smaller is better. A smaller waist (for me, that train left the station decades ago). A gift in a tiny box from your SO at Christmas. A smaller credit card bill.
Sometimes, as writers, we dream of running with the big dogs. Signing with a big publisher. Getting a big advance. Getting big, splashy promotion events set up.
I thought about this after I read Cathy C. Hall’s post. It came at the perfect time, because recently my manuscript was accepted by a small publisher. Margo Dill began her press not long ago. I think she’s published around 10 books so far. As far as I know, it’s just Margo. She doesn’t have a staff (although her daughter might do some reading of the kids’ books to give her official “thumbs-up” approval). Her business is small, and the way she does business is personal… which I love.
Here are some things that are happening with Margo that I think would be impossible if I had been accepted by a bigger publisher:
- Our contract--The publishing contract went through some changes. There were things I didn’t understand. She rewrote it to spell things out to me. After much thought, I decided I didn’t want to make any money from this book. Margo altered the contract to reflect that, and made arrangements to collect my proceeds until they amount to something… and then I’ll decide what Tulsa-based group will benefit from the book sales. I don’t think a bigger publisher would be as flexible or as accommodating as Margo has been.
- My book cover--I knew a talented artist, and I hoped she would be able to create the cover. Margo was happy to let that happen. Of course, she would have to approve the cover, and she suggested some minor changes with the title (she was so right) and now the cover is real and it’s spectacular (if you’re a fanatical Seinfeld fan, you’re welcome). With a bigger publisher, most of the time they arrange for an artist, and it’s their choice. If a writer is lucky, they’ll have some input. Sometimes, they have none. The cover--the first thing a prospective reader sees--is out of the author’s hands.
- Editing--A few nights ago, I got an email about the edits I’m going to have to make. Margo wasn’t quite ready--hadn’t finished yet--and wondered if the timeline was too tight for me. Would I be able to do the editing by the end of February? If she was asking too much, she said she could change the timeline to accommodate me. How thoughtful. I don’t imagine a bigger publisher would consider my needs and my responsibilities. I imagine with a big press, I’d be left with footprints on my back as they ran over me, hurrying to the next project.
Okay, to be completely honest, if my manuscript had been accepted by a big publisher and I had the chance to get a cushy advance and I was getting into the Stephen King stratosphere of success because of the contract, I would have loved it. However, I like being part of a small press. Margo doesn’t have dozens of authors to promote. I appreciate being one of the fish in her just-right pond…
How about you? What experiences have you had--with publishers, agents, writing conferences, critique groups? Were they big or small? What size is “just right” from your perspective?
Sioux Roslawski is a middle school teacher, a freelance writer, and in April she’ll have her middle-grade historical novel debut. Henry’s Story: Greenwood Gone is about the Tulsa Race Massacre. If you’d like to read more of Sioux’s writing, check out her blog.
Success Is Yours To Share
I nodded my head the whole time I read Cathy's post because I'm the worst offender of this. I'll look at all I've accomplished so far and constantly be disappointed in myself that it’s not enough--there aren't enough reviews or followers or national publications on my bio. I had a book review column in the Sunday edition of The News-Gazette (Champaign-Urbana IL) for six years, which is pretty cool, but my brain will say: Well, it wasn't The Chicago Tribune.
Sometimes, this type of thinking serves me well because it helps with my drive and persistence. These thoughts keep me achieving more and more. But it's also exhausting and probably not very mentally healthy. I'm always telling everyone else that we should celebrate every success from accomplishing a short-term goal to getting twenty reviews on Amazon to making the New York Times Best Sellers List. Celebrating success helps to keep us going with our writing. It gives us an "attitude of gratitude." And success—big or small—is something to turn to when we're feeling down about a rejection or a one-star review.
This is why I LOVE that I am the collector of success stories for WOW! If you're a Facebook page member or Instagram follower, you've probably seen a post like the one I posted yesterday:
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Save the Cat! Online Class & Story Cards Blog Tour & Giveaway
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About Save the Cat! Story Cards
Interview with Leah Olson: Q1 2021 Creative Nonfiction Third-Place Winner and Runner Up
- "Who Gets to be Afraid in America?" by Ibram X. Kendi: A personal essay plus commentary centered on the fear of a Black man who wants to go out for a run, written in the aftermath of the Ahmaud Arbery murder. As a runner and the sister to four Black brothers and a woman of color, this gave me chills. It forced me to take a hard look at my own attitude as a person who has lived in comfortable worlds, largely "passing" as white. It did not sugarcoat and I felt like I needed to see this.
- "I'm on the bus to go see my son Henry at the hospital" by Rob Delaney, published on Medium. This is the harrowing account of a dad losing his two-year-old to a brain tumor. My son was two at the time I read this and I did not want to read it at first. I thought, I am going to spiral into anxiety about my absolute nightmare. And then I thought, tough sh*t, it's not always about you! I came across this essay and now I have the chance to meet a person who is surviving what used to be his nightmare, too, and he has the strength to share his story with us. Human to human. I really appreciate that bravery.
- "Moving On" by Nora Ephron, published in The New Yorker. I am inspired by Nora Ephron's ability to insert humor into an emotional, sensitive, heavy subject (starting over with her two young kids after a divorce). Sometimes it just feels good to laugh, even about the things that hurt.
Becoming a Servant-Leader
Over the past few months I’ve been thinking about my leadership style, and after reading an article my husband plucked from his files and gave to me, I’ve figured out I aspire to be a servant-leader.
- Listening intently to others.
- Having empathy.
- Helping oneself and others to heal.
- Awareness in understanding issues involving ethics and values.
- Using persuasion rather than positional authority when making decisions.
- Balancing conceptualization with a “day-to-day” focused approach.
- Using foresight to understand lessons from the past and realities of the present.
- Practicing stewardship and serving the needs of others.
- Commitment to the growth of people.
- Building community.
Renee Roberson is an award-winning freelance writer and magazine editor who also hosts the true crime podcast, Missing in the Carolinas. Learn more at FinishedPages.com.
Friday Speak Out!: In the Beginning
by Anne Leigh Parrish
I persisted. “Among The Bohemians” was an uneven, heartfelt ramble about a recent party we’d attended which read more like an essay than a piece of fiction. It was one long description, what my mentor at The Atlantic Monthly would later call “a how things are story.” Not much happened. The narrator, who looked and thought a great deal like me, stood at the window of the funky artist’s loft where her husband’s friend lived and gazed forlornly at the old carved buildings that characterize Seattle’s Pioneer Square. She concluded the buildings were inspiring and the company wasn’t. She felt like an outsider. The friend’s husband was an artist, not a very good one, and his paintings hung everywhere. She/I wandered past them, trying to discover or impute meaning to the deep lines, sharp corners, and muted colors he favored.
The beginning of my writing life lasted a long time, even though I improved and was more deft on the page. People came to life, said funny things, and were plausible. But they were stuck in murky place, floating and hovering just on the edge of meaning. It was only when doubt gave way to revelation, when the narrator’s understanding of her situation changed, or the reader’s understanding of it changed, that my stories resonated. This moment often came at the end.
Endings became key for me. I had to know how a story ended before I could write it. The beginning could be redone to fit that ending, and so could everything else. It’s what you leave the reader with that came to matter most, and I carried this belief into my novels and later my poems. How a reader experiences us is crucial. But even more important is how we’re remembered.
Maybe that’s my sixty-something self, talking back to my twenty-something self. What I’m certain of as a writer with decades under my belt is good craft comes from both of skill and confidence. That’s the long version. The short version is know what you want to say, then know when you’ve said it.
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Anne Leigh Parrish's novel, A Winter Night, arrives this March from Unsolicited Press. Also forthcoming from Unsolicited Press, An Open Door, a novel, will be available in October 2022, along with The Moon Won’t Be Dared, a book of poems, in the fall of 2021. Previous titles are: What Nell Dreams; Maggie’s Ruse; The Amendment; Women Within; By the Wayside; What Is Found, What Is Lost; Our Love Could Light The World; and All The Roads That Lead From Home. She lives among the evergreen trees in the South Sound region of Washington State. Learn more at Anne Leigh Parrish Fiction Writer Pacific Northwest – Award-Winning Writer and Poet
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Would you like to participate in Friday "Speak Out!"? Email your short posts (under 500 words) about women and writing to: marcia[at]wow-womenonwriting[dot]com for consideration. We look forward to hearing from you!
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