Friday Speak Out!: Writing about the Loss of Home in my New Memoir, Sand and Steel

by Dorit Sasson

When I first started writing my second memoir Sand and Steel: A Memoir of Longing and Finding Home back in 2017, I had no idea how our homes would become the center of our lives and that the book will offer readers a different appreciation of home.

Even after fifteen years in the States, as an Israeli expat I’m still struck by the differences in size between our kibbutz and our Pittsburgh home (Israel is the size of Delaware). In the book I write: “I’ll soon learn that when you’re an immigrant to the States or even a returning American, everything feels big, bigger than you. You try not to focus on it, but America’s vastness will not let you forget.”

All Jews to some extent wonder about this back and forth idea of Israel as “home.” For me, writing about home was somewhat a disorienting identity struggle. Each time I wrote about what I gave up to come to America, my heart grew heavy. But to write about the loss of home in an engaging way, I had to take a non-linear approach. So here’s what I did.

I unpacked the struggle to immerse in a new country

Readers have often told me they’ve appreciated my candor and honesty as they travel with me on my journey to finding my US home as a returning American. Because I have lived extensively on two continents, I felt I owed it to my readers to understand the geographical and cultural differences between Israel and America and how those feelings of “coming home” challenged and changed me.

I had to go deep with the theme of struggle

Sand and Steel is a cultural mixing memoir in the sense that I needed so much introspective observation to tease apart the things that our monocultural world often takes for granted. Target, Costco, SUVs do not exist in Israel. Parents in Israel do not schedule “playdates” in advance. I had to “teach” readers about the struggles people must face when they leave their homeland and move to a different culture or country.

I needed to redefine the role of a “rooter”

The U.S. Department of State’s website describes Reverse Culture Shock as an “emotional displacement syndrome.” Most people are familiar with the term culture shock, but RCS is much less understood. The constant “yo-yoing” between Israel and Jewish identities stressed and agitated me. In Pittsburgh I had to build U.S. roots, but my heart always felt (still does) that belongs in Israel.

I describe the holy land, “my heart home.” Translating these disorienting feelings were important for making broader identity connections. I was no longer an Israeli; I was now an American Jew – a minority in a minority culture. What did that imply for my spiritual identity?

Finding home again whether we’re talking about moving to another state or country means rebuilding from scratch relationships, a support system. To some degree we’ve had to do this in our global pandemic. Writing Sand and Steel took this process a step up. It’s a story I’m still living.

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Dorit Sasson is the award-winning author of Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces and the newly released Sand and Steel: A Memoir of Longing and Finding Home. As a certified SEO (search engine optimization) strategist and copywriter, she works with companies, small businesses, and non-profits to increase online visibility with leads and conversions.
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Would you like to participate in Friday "Speak Out!"? Email your short posts (under 500 words) about women and writing to: marcia[at]wow-womenonwriting[dot]com for consideration. We look forward to hearing from you!
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At the Seam of the Historical, Literary, and Surreal: Interview with Clare Beams, author of The Illness Lesson

CLARE BEAMS is the author of the story collection We Show What We Have Learned, which won the Bard Fiction Prize and was a Kirkus Best Debut of 2016, as well as a finalist for the PEN/Robert W. Bingham Prize, the New York Public Library's Young Lions Fiction Award, and the Shirley Jackson Award.

She lives in Pittsburgh with her husband and two daughters, and has taught creative writing at Carnegie Mellon University and St. Vincent College.

If you haven't done so already, check out Clare's more recent published novel The Illness Lesson and then return here for a chat with the author.

***

WOW: Congratulations on such wonderful media coverage for The Illness Lesson. I just started reading it and it's unlike anything I've ever read mainly because the character is so female-driven. How did the idea for the novel come about? Would you categorize the novel as historical fiction?

Clare: Thank you! The novel started for me the way most of my writing does—with an image that turns out (in ways I’m not conscious of, at first) to hold many of the story’s eventual ideas and themes. I’d recently been to Fruitlands, site of a failed commune started by Bronson Alcott (Louisa May Alcott’s father)—a place full of beautiful ideas and blind spots—and I had this image of a red bird descending on that very traditionally pastoral New England landscape, something that would be strikingly out of place and unsettling. The birds end up having a lot to do with the contradictions of the school itself: a school for girls, founded with good and noble intentions that nonetheless doesn’t have all that much awareness of what it means to be a girl in that time and place.

It’s strange—obviously the novel is historical fiction, in that it’s set in 1871 and does take place in and around real historical movements. But it’s also the kind of novel that invents a strange species of bird. I think I see it living somewhere at the seam of the historical, the literary, and the surreal.

WOW: You mentioned that in the seven (7!) years it took you to write it, you moved and had 2 children. That's quite some project! What did it take to complete that big goal?

Clare: It took a lot of time and focus that were sometimes very hard to come by! Ultimately, it was a start-and-stop process. The final push came as a full-family effort—I’d ended up with a semester with no teaching in it, not entirely by choice, and we decided to turn that semester into the time I needed to complete the massive overhaul I knew the book required. I had to find a concentrated burst of time in which to get the whole thing into my head again, instead of picking away at it. And so for those three months, my husband was the one to stay home when the kids were sick, deal with the plumber, etc., so that I could live as fully as possible in the world of this book.

"Try to avoid feeling prematurely discouraged, and just get something down, and then set about fixing it. Fixing it turns out to be—for me, anyway—where so much of the joy lies."

WOW: And on that same note, I just have to ask... how did you manage to stay motivated and disciplined to write to the finish line through the difficult moments? I know you had a lot of support? Did you have a publishing deal from the start to help you stay focused on those difficult days? What was your big WHY?

Clare: Yes, I had lots of support from the people in my professional and personal lives. But no, I had no publishing deal! I did publish We Show What We Have Learned, my story collection, in 2016—partway through the work of finishing this novel—and that book’s reception gave me a sense that there were some readers out there who might respond to this novel, to whom it might mean something. That was motivating. And I loved these characters and felt like they and their situation were important—important at least to me. Practically speaking, I had an agent who was asking periodically how things were going with this novel. For that last burst of work, those concentrated three months, I gave myself a deadline for getting her a draft, and then I just decided to do my best to stick to it.

WOW: You have an extensive career as a professional instructor of writing. How did that background help you write this novel?

Clare: Teaching does serve as a useful reminder sometimes, in that instructions you’re giving your students can function as reminders to yourself, too. I’m always telling my students to ground things in the sensory, to be specific, to allow their characters full human complication; those are things I always try to bear in mind too.

WOW: Do you have any advice for writers seeking to take an idea into fiction? What would be the best place to start?

Clare: Truly, I think the most important thing is just to start. Ideas are so wonderfully glowing, so uncomplicatedly brilliant, when they live just in our heads. The thing you manage to put on the paper never quite matches up, exactly (though it can become its own wonderful thing), and that contrast can feel discouraging enough to stop a writer altogether. But no one else can see the thing in your head. The version on paper is all you have, if you want to share it. So what I would say is that writers just starting out should try to avoid feeling prematurely discouraged, and just get something down, and then set about fixing it. Fixing it turns out to be—for me, anyway—where so much of the joy lies.

"When I write about the past I’m often really writing about the present—looking to history to provide an intensified stage on which to consider issues we still face."

WOW: As one reviewer put it, "I quickly identified The Illness Lesson as a book dealing with similar issues girls and women continue to face in modern times." Having not yet finished the book, could you speak to this? And what would be takeaways for the reader in dealing with these issues?

Clare: Well, I think when I write about the past I’m often really writing about the present—looking to history to provide an intensified stage on which to consider issues we still face. I think that’s certainly true here. The kinds of questions The Illness Lesson addresses aren’t, I don’t think, questions with easy answers or easy takeaways. I think I’m just hoping readers will find that at the end of the book they can see certain forces in their own lives more clearly.

WOW: Thank you for sharing your writing with us and for your thoughtful responses.

***

Interviewed by Dorit Sasson whose upcoming memoir Sand and Steel: A Memoir of Longing and Coming Home will be released later this year by Mascot Books.

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Slow Down and Be Present: Interview with Dr. Beth Ricanati of the Award-Winning Braided: A Journey of a Thousand Challahs

Beth Ricanati, MD is an award-winning author who has built her career around bringing wellness into women’s everyday lives, especially moms juggling life and children. She practiced medicine at NY-Presbyterian/Columbia University Medical Center, the Cleveland Clinic, and now at the Venice Family Clinic. She lives in the Los Angeles area with her family and one challah-loving dog.

In this interview, Dorit Sasson chats with Beth about keeping up a mindfulness practice, writing her award-winning memoir/cookbook/self-help book all rolled into one, and balancing life as a physician and writer mama with book promotion and authoring.

 If you haven't done so already, check out Beth's award-winning memoir Braided: A Journey of a Thousand Challahs.

***

WOW: So curious to know how it’s been for you to educate both challah and non-challah audiences? By that I mean, how did the book resonate universally?

Beth: Braided has resonated with so many diverse individuals: men and women, Jewish and non-Jewish. I have heard from readers who were going through a difficult time and found solace in the book’s message to stop, slow down, and take care of oneself. I have heard from readers who have reconnected to their Judaism by making challah, either for the first time or coming back to this ritual after a long time. In addition, I have made challah and shared my story all over the country this past year, with traditional Jewish organizations (think: JCC and synagogues) and more non-traditional venues (think universities and non-profits).

WOW: Wow! Talk about universal and culinary appeal across audiences. You mention in previous interviews that one of the biggest inspirations for writing Braided was learning how to slow down and be present. Since the book has been published, what have been some of the challenges keeping up a mindfulness practice given that baking challah is just one part of the week?

Beth: I not only look forward to making challah every Friday, but I have continued to incorporate the lessons that I’ve learned on these Fridays into my life the rest of the week. In fact, it was these lessons in part that led me to write Braided in the first place. I couldn’t be the only stressed-out mom on the block, and if what I learned had had such an impact on me, I was hopeful that it would also have an impact on others. The more I incorporated what I was learning from making challah into my daily life, the more aware I became of other Jewish mindfulness rituals that are built into the rhythm of our daily lives, not just once a week – we have so many opportunities every day to be mindful! For example, there is a blessing I try to remember to say when I get up in every morning, grateful for another day.

WOW: I love how mindfulness is a daily practice for you Jewishly as well. I try cultivating this daily wisdom as well. It is such an important part of your award-winning book, which you present as part memoir, part cookbook part self-help. I'm so curious as to how the book's format evolved. I mean did you know you would be writing a cookbook/memoir/self-help - all in one?

Beth: Having never written a book like this before, I did not know exactly how it would evolve, but I did know what I wanted to share: my story of discovering that this ancient ritual of making challah every Friday could be accessible to someone like me, and that I could incorporate it – making challah – into my life so much so that it changed my life. As a result, the story that I began to tell evolved into not only a memoir, but also a cookbook – how to make challah – as well as a self-help guide incorporating some of my physician background. Relatively early on, the idea to divide the book into chapters based on lines of the recipe helped to give the book its much needed structure.

"The act of making the bread – mixing and kneading, watching and waiting – can heal your heartache and your emptiness, your sense of being overwhelmed; it did for me."

WOW: I love the idea of incorporating snippets of recipes to frame the structure. Tell us more about how you managed to promote/write/mother and be a practicing physician? I'm in awe. What advice would you give other writer mamas who are struggling to stick to a writing practice, complete their projects and believe in themselves?

Beth: Making challah is a journey, right? You start with six ingredients and a bowl. Later that day, if you’re fortunate, you are surrounded by friends and family at the dinner table, warm challah in your hands as you say the blessing, inhale that amazing aroma of freshly baked bread and then dive in. Writing, and subsequently publishing a book, is also a journey, I’ve learned. I had to call my friend who shared the recipe originally with me four times that first day that I made challah – and I’m still learning all kinds of tips and tricks to improve my challah (thank you readers and event attendees who’ve shared your stories with me!); similarly, I’ve reached out to so many people along the way to see the book to where it is now. I worked with a book coach; I’ve had the support of other authors (like you!) who share my imprint, She Writes Press; and so many others. Being a parent and being a physician is also a journey. Ultimately, I’ve come to realize that all of what I do is synergistic: I like to help others heal and feel better along their journey. Talking about Braided, making challah with others, or working with a patient in clinic, it all comes back to healing for me. I like being part of the journey.

WOW: I love that we’re all connected and part of that healing journey. If you could choose just a small excerpt from Braided, what excerpt would be your favorite and why?

Beth: The last paragraph of the book is what I like to read at events because I think it perfectly sums up why I make challah weekly and what you can expect from this magical ritual. You don’t need to be a baker. You can be alone, or with others. None of it matters. Just get out a bowl and get to it:

The act of making the bread – mixing and kneading, watching and waiting – can heal your heartache and your emptiness, your sense of being overwhelmed; it did for me. You could break bread once a week, every week. I did. You can make it alone or with other women, like [I] have done. The smell of fresh baking bread turned our house into a home. So go ahead, get down those ingredients, grab a bowl, and call me in the morning. I’d love to hear how you’re doing.

WOW: What a true sentiment of sisterhood. And I can attest to the power of community challah baking having participated in various mega challah and other community events. It’s very special the work you’re putting out in the world and best of luck on your writing journey!

***

Interviewed by Dorit Sasson whose upcoming memoir Sand and Steel: A Memoir of Longing and Coming Home will be released later this year by Mascot Books.

Dorit is an instructor for WOW! Women On Writing. Her popular workshop Polish Your Memoir in 5 Weeks will be running again in the Spring. Check back for start dates.

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Dorit Sasson Launches Her WOW! Blog Tour of Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces

& book giveaway!

At age nineteen, Dorit Sasson, a dual American-Israeli citizen, was trying to make the status quo work as a college student―until she realized that if she didn’t distance herself from her neurotic, worrywart of a mother, she would become just like her.

Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces is Sasson’s story of how she dropped out of college and volunteered for the Israel Defense Forces in an effort to change her life―and how, in stepping out of her comfort zone and into a war zone, she discovered courage and faith she didn’t know she was capable of.

Paperback: 337 pages
Genre: Memoir
Publisher: She Writes Press (June 14, 2016)
ISBN-10: 1631520350
ISBN-13: 978-1631520358

Accidental Soldier is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and IndieBound.

Book Giveaway Contest:
To win a copy of Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces  please enter using the Rafflecopter form at the bottom of this post. The giveaway contest closes this Monday, June 27th at 12:00 AM EST. We will announce the winner the same day in the Rafflecopter widget. Good luck!

About the Author:

Dorit Sasson writes for a wide range of print and online publications, including The Huffington Post and The Writer, and speaks at conferences, libraries, and community centers. She is the author of the a featured chapter in Pebbles in the Pond: Transforming the World One Person at a Time, the latest installment of that best-selling series, and. She is the host of the global radio show "Giving Voice to Your Courageous Story." She lives in Pittsburgh, PA with her husband and two children.

Find Dorit Sasson Online:

Websites: www.DoritSasson.com, www.GivingaVoicetotheVoicelessbook.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoritSassonauthorAccidentalSoldier/

Twitter: @VoicetoStory

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/givingvoice/

----- Interview by Crystal J. Otto

WOW: Dorit, you really are a do everything gal. I'm absolutely amazed at your many talents. Please tell us, as a global radio show host, did you experience any stage fright and how did you personally overcome this, or how you helped someone else through this type of experience?

Dorit: When I first created Giving Voice to Your Story back in 2013 which is now Giving Voice to Your Courage podcast, I wasn't so sure how I was going to get over some of my insecurity around podcasting especially since I couldn't see any of my guests, some of whom were authors of note such as Julia Cameron of the well-known The Artist's Way and Linda Gray Sexton, daughter of the Pulitzer prize winner Anne Sexton. This shook me up immensely. I won't deny it... I had several sleepless nights.

But with each interview, I kept reminding and asking myself that this podcast is not about me - it's about serving my target audience. What do they need and want? In this case, I interview authors, entrepreneurs and basically anyone with a story of courage. This is a very relatable issue and I'm always on the hunt to make it even more relatable. I am always stretching myself to get out of my comfort zone.

This tactic has helped me connect more authentically with my guests.

WOW: Authenticity is definitely important when it comes to connecting with people in general, but especially readers of your memoir. I love how that's been at the forefront for you in many areas of your professional and personal life.

If you could chose just a small excerpt from Accidental Soldier - what excerpt would be your favorite and why?

Dorit: Wow. This is a hard one. There's many sections where I'm trying to navigate both the militaristic and cultural worlds as an American-Israeli trying to fit in.

Singing Ella Fitzgerald's version of "Summertime" on a dusty base in the middle of the Arava desert in the chapter "Giving Voice" would have to be one of my favorite scenes. As a graduate of vocal music of the FAME school in New York City, I'm finally able to give a voice to the experience of serving in uniform on a settlement where the "distance" between myself and our commanding officers is rather friendly. All throughout high school, I felt "voiceless" and unworthy. Ironically, as an IDF soldier, I learn to trust the process of finding my voice on an unknown dirty and tiny base in the middle of nowhere.

At seven o’clock in the evening two days later, I appear on a bungalow stoop facing an empty desert, wearing a dusty civilian shirt, my hands tucked into the pockets of my army work pants. The sun’s still high above me, and my “audience”—members of my garin and the Israeli-born garin—sit on the grass. Our commanding officers stand behind them.

Silence.

I take a deep breath and introduce each song in Hebrew briefly.

Some of the commanding officers’ hats are pulled down to block out the glare of the sun, so there’s no way of seeing their expressions. Will there be a cringing face, or whispers of disapproval?

I decide to go with the flow: I lift my chest and open my mouth.

I have the entire “stage” to myself. I trill on the high notes without belting. My voice travels. With each note, I feel the distance between my high school self and who I am today becoming smaller. My entire body shakes with nervous excitement and anticipatory anxiety.

As I get deeper into “Summertime,” I try to avoid focusing on the garin and their expressions. This hot desert is the perfect setting for the song. I try my best to execute Ella’s flawless, melismatic style, letting thoughts of her rich voice carry me like warm honey. Each time I end a cadence, I control and deepen my voice just like she does in the recording I know so well.

As I near the end of the song, my heart beats fast.

What’s this? There’s clapping. They liked it! Even as I run to sit on the grass, avoiding people’s eyes, the clapping is still going. I squeeze in between two of the Israeli garin members on the ground. Someone reaches from behind and squeezes my hand.

The next day, Michal, Hiyah, and Miki from the Israeli garin, and even a second officer named Debbie, approach me at breakfast.

“Wow, Dorit, you sang great. We didn’t know you could sing like that.”

I smile widely. I didn’t know I could sing like that, either.

It occurs to me: I’m not just a soldier anymore. I’m someone with a voice.

My second favorite scene:

Arriving at our first real military assignment with my group near the Israel - Lebanese border would have to be another one of my favorite scenes even though it was a hard scene to write because I had to translate so much emotional and cultural content, but it shows real depth of myself as protagonist. It is a true test of how I'm able to separate from my Mom's unrealistic fears about Israel and become my own person, which is the heart of the mother-daughter story.

An officer on the bus starts speaking about the strategic location of Avivim: Our base is less than one kilometer from the Shiite village Saliha and from the Blue Line, a border between Lebanon and Israel established in 2000 for purposes of identifying the withdrawal between Lebanon and the Israeli-controlled Golan Heights. I have no idea what to expect in terms of what kind of job I might have once we get to Avivim, but it’s clear that it won’t be a nine to five secretarial job. I intuitively feel that my new job will entail something that keeps the base running, but I don’t quite exactly know yet what this will mean as far as my day to day life.

Knowing we are so close now to Lebanon awakens a far-distant memory: It is 1982, and I’m eleven years old, visiting my aunt and uncle at Malkiyah. I’m with my parents and it’s the height of the Lebanese–Israeli war. All along the road on either side of the border are burnt cars with dark hollow spaces like cavernous eyes. Mom is startled by the number of destroyed cars, and though she stays silent, she pulls me closer. I’m too young to understand the specifics of this ongoing war, but I sense her fear.

Although there’s no threat of a war now, as we close in on the last ten minutes of our journey, I realize I’m up against Mom’s deep-rooted—and unrealistic—fears about Israel. Fear knocks on my door like an old childhood friend. The difference, though, is that now I can see, clear as day, that I don’t want it anymore. It’s not serving me. And I know that my fear of what might happen in Israel is based on the media images of terrorism and bombings that I’ve seen over the years. Yes, those things are real, but I now know that the picture the media paints is exaggerated. Mom would fret over a bomb exploding on this base, or alongside the border, but the chances of that happening are low, and furthermore, thinking and fretting about it all the time is pointless. People who’ve grown up here simply don’t worry about what might happen. You are cautious, but you live your life. I choose to look to these people as examples, and to separate myself from Mom’s warped picture of what life is like here. The fact that I’m here, right now, submerging myself in a piece of Israeli history that I was taught to fear, is symbolic of just how much I’ve already separated from Mom in this one short year abroad, and I relish in that thought.

Each time I begin to think negative thoughts, I catch myself. She controlled me back in the States, but I can’t let her control me now.

This is it. The moment of truth and change. We’re almost at the base. This is where I need to get a handle on my fear. Somewhere in my youth, Mom planted the seed that Israel, as a country targeted by terrorists, is a place to be feared. But instead of thinking about that, I try focusing on my mission and why I’m here. This service is real. You’re safe. You’re not going to be blown up.

WOW: Thank you for those sneak peeks - what a special treat!

Tell us more about how you juggle your career along with raising your family? What advice would you give other writer mamas?

Dorit: I won't sugarcoat this juggling act - it is particularly hard as a working parent of young children. I struggled with it while writing Accidental Soldier, and I still struggle with it. But here's what I've been doing that has been helpful:

• I seek out accountability - usually in the form of a writing class or sending out work to an editor/writing partner. I'm easily frazzled. I need structure to help me deal with the chaos. I also need to constantly improve my writing skills.
• I enlist the support of my family. By now, they are very well seasoned to my crazy need to write.
• I try and forgive myself on the days when it doesn't feel as if I'm making any real writing progress.
• I make sure to schedule downtime for chilling and doing nothing to help balance the intense hours of writing, revising and solitude.
• I timeblock writing time otherwise it won't get scheduled (and I mean, won't) and it works!
• I connect with other likeminded authors/writers and particularly those with young children, but they are often hard to get because they're busy writing. I sometimes feel as if I'm an odd and weird one.
• I timeblock writing and marketing/promotion. I alternate days for writing and marketing - they require different energies and they are two different "animals."

It's a constant need for balance - and because it's so challenging, it's easy to give up, but never give up on something that's so important to you as the need to write.

WOW: I absolutely needed to hear that - thanks for not sugar coating! You definitely make the balance look easy!

How did you end up pairing with She Writes Press? What advice would you give other authors interested in publishing their memoir?

Dorit: When I was in the throes of decision making, I've written extensively about this journey which you can read about here and here. Basically, She Writes Press was always my first choice from the beginning. I worked with Brooke Warner, publisher of She Writes and my editor and coach closely on the manuscript from the very beginning, and it seemed like a natural fit. I had already tasted the traditional world of publishing mainly with two academic books, but it wasn't until I gave the agent world a whirl that I realized that my memoir was better off with She Writes Press.

Accidental Soldier was rejected over 100 times. (Yes, I've counted the emails.) When I realized how cold and highly subjective the agent world really was, I signed the contract with She Writes Press. That was all I needed to know. And I've never looked back on that decision since.

I would encourage prospective authors to really really make sure you've got a well-written and marketable story before you rush to publish it.

I've blogged about the importance of hiring an editor - it's so important. You only got one shot as a published author to make a good impression and word quickly spreads about bad books and poor writing.

Nowadays, there are so many publishing choices. I'm a firm proponent in having your book traditionally distributed. Distribution is so important - you want your book to be accessible in the book buying channels. You're taken much more seriously as an author, but unfortunately, many librarians and book proprietors don't know what hybrid really means, so I'm an ambassador out there also educating the masses.

WOW: Rejected over 100 times? That had to be hard; good thing for good support! Speaking of which, who has been your biggest supporter during your writing career and specifically concerning publishing your memoir?

Dorit: I would have to say Brooke Warner who saw that manuscript from a very messy and "shitty" draft as Anne Lamott has famously said, to the finish line. Brooke's astute and keen advice bolstered me during the "stormy" journey.

She also witnessed me transform and grow to a published author. Not all writers stay committed to the finish line.

WOW: Thank heavens for Brooke and her honesty as well as her stick-to-it-iveness!

How do you deal with rejection and what wisdom can you share with others?

Dorit: There's a few ways I've dealt with rejection and as a published memoir that has now been shortlisted for a literary award, rejection still stings.

Here's what softens the blow:

1. I constantly keep pieces circulating - I think someone said once to have 13 pieces circulating at one time. I have more than that - I send out to contests, and magazines. So when I get a rejection, I immediately send that piece (or something else) somewhere else.
2. I read testimonials and reviews on bad days to help bolster my confidence.
3. I try and learn from the rejection.
4. I look for new markets to submit my work.
5. I constantly aim for writer growth.

WOW: I love your honesty not only in your book, but also in this interview and every step along the way. You are such a breath of fresh air Dorit!

Was anyone concerned with you sharing your personal story with the world? How did you overcome those objections?

Dorit: I am lucky to have a support network of family and friends though the thought does sometimes cross my mind especially when I near the date of publication. You need some serious thick skin to publish a memoir, and I don't know anyone who doesn't lose any sleep over letting their memoir fly to the world.

I won't deny that I haven't had "what if" type thoughts--about my network not liking what they've read and the nasty trolls who get a jolly from badmouthing someone's writing.

But hey, this is really my journey, my truth, courage and deep story of what I've translated and experienced serving in a foreign military that wasn't my country. It's a mother-daughter story. It's a love story. It's a story of faith. It's courage. Nobody can take this truth away from me. I've earned the title of memoirist because I've experienced those "emotional miles" enough to want to give voice to them.

Obviously, it's easier to write about a family member when that person isn't alive. In my case, my mother. And I know she would have been proud of my achievements if she was alive today. I felt safe enough to write about our relationship.

Dr. Linda Joy Myers, one of my earlier mentors said something very wise when I first started writing Accidental Soldier: protect yourself. Don't involve family members. Don't talk about your book. Don't talk up your book with anyone.

With memoir particularly, you need to feel very safe when you write. Family didn't really know of my intent to publish a memoir of my IDF experience until the manuscript was firmed up and I'd signed a contract. The next thing they saw was a picture of myself in IDF uniform on my Facebook. And so it goes.

WOW: You mention so many familiar names and people I've had the pleasure of getting to know. It's fabulous to hear that the industry has really embraced Accidental Soldier!

What's next? You're so busy - so what is brewing for Dorit Sasson later in 2016 and beyond?

Dorit: Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces was officially published on June 14 2016 and I'll be doing some speaking and touring around the book - in the Pittsburgh area and participating with the SWP tour hopefully, in New York City, Washington DC and Chicago. I'm pitching my book at the Jewish Book Conference in New York City, and these days, I'm working on my 2 minute pitch to grab the attention of programmers who might want me to speak to their groups about my book.

I'm hoping to take the book on tour ... in Israel! I'm also working on a second book - which I haven't decided if it'll be a memoir or a collection of essays.

WOW: Such an exciting time for you. You've got to be jumping with joy!

You're my idol when it comes to stepping outside of your comfort zone - what can you tell others who may be hesitant about moving forward into uncharted territory personally or professionally?

Dorit: Wow, thank you so much for the accolade!

It's always scary to jump into something new. Here's what I say, feel the fear, just do it anyway. And don't forget the important thing - detach from outcomes.

I'd much rather feel the fear than regret that I didn't take the opportunity. Regret is a hard thing to live with. Seek out support and mentors. If you're a writer, learn what the masters have done to conquer their fears, and follow the beat of your own drum.

WOW: Thank you again Dorit. You are absolutely a joy to work with and I have enjoyed every moment of preparation for what is sure to be an amazing book blog tour!

----------Blog Tour Dates

Monday, June 20th @ The Muffin
Stop by for an interview and book giveaway!
http://muffin.wow-womenonwriting.com/

Tuesday, June 21st @ Choices with Madeline Sharples
Dorit Sasson authors today's guest post at Choices with Madeline Sharples. Don't miss her post titled: "Working with the inner critics when writing a memoir" and learn more about Dorit's memoir Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces.
http://madelinesharples.com/

Wednesday, June 22nd @ Linda Appleman Shapiro
Linda Appleman Shapiro hosts Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces and the author Dorit Sasson pens today's guest post titled "The Trauma of Leaving my Mother to Service in the Israel Defense Service". Find out more about Dorit, her memoir, and her experiences. This is a blog stop you won't want to miss!
http://applemanshapiro.com/

Thursday, June 23rd @ Writers Pay It Forward
Find out what MC Simon has to say after reading Dorit Sasson's memoir Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces. This is a review you won't want to miss.
http://writerspayitforward.org/

Friday, June 24th @ Sherrey Meyer
Dorit Sasson is the author of today's guest post "What Americans Can Learn from Israel and the IDF". Thank you Sherrey Meyer for hosting this post and giveaway where one lucky reader will receive their own copy of Dorit's memoir Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces.
http://sherreymeyer.com/

Monday, June 27th @ Memoir Writer’s Journey with Kathleen Pooler
Readers at Memoir Writer's Journey with Kathleen Pooler are in for a special treat with the guest post by Dorit Sasson: "How I was able to tell my mother daughter story in Accidental Soldier" and one lucky reader will receive a giveaway copy of Dorit's memoir Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces.
http://krpooler.com/

Tuesday, June 28th @ All Things Audry
Dorit Sasson is the author of today's guest post at All Things Audry. Don't miss: "The process for Accidental Soldier."
http://allthingsaudry.blogspot.com/

Wednesday, June 29th @ Jerry Waxler
Fellow author and memoir writer Jerry Waxler reviews "Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces" by Dorit Sasson and asks some great questions of Sasson. This is an interview and review you won't want to miss!
http://jerrywaxler.com/

Thursday, June 30th @ Writers Pay It Forward
Dorit Sasson pens today's guest post at Writers Pay It Forward as she talks about "Promoting Accidental Soldier in the United States and in Israel" where readers can learn more about Dorit's memoir Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces.
http://writerspayitforward.org/

Friday, July 1st @Coming Down the Mountain
Karen Jones Gowen reviews Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces.
http://karenjonesgowen.blogspot.com/

Wednesday, July 6th @ Lisa Haselton
Lisa Haselton interviews Dorit Sasson about her memoir and offers one lucky reader their very own copy with a giveaway of Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces.
http://lisahaseltonsreviewsandinterviews.blogspot.com/

Tuesday, July 12th @ Mari McCarthy's Create Write Now
Join Mari McCarthy at Create Write Now as she hosts guest blogger Dorit Sasson with the intriguing post "The Courage to Be an Israel Heroine" and find out more about Sasson's memoir Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Forces. Don't miss this great guest post and book blog tour stop!
http://www.createwritenow.com/

Get Involved! If you have a website or blog and would like to host one of our touring authors or schedule a tour of your own, please email us at blogtour@wow-womenonwriting.com.

*****BOOK GIVEAWAY*****

Enter to win a copy of Accidental Soldier: A Memoir of Service and Sacrifice in the Israel Defense Service by Dorit Sasson! Just fill out the Rafflecopter form below. We will announce the winner in the Rafflecopter widget next Monday, June 27th!

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10 comments Accidental Soldier, author blog tour, Dorit Sasson, Israel Defense Forces, memoir, She Writes Press

How Blogging Connects Authors with their Target Readers

A following of targeted readers curated from blogging isn't built overnight. It’s a long term strategy and takes a great deal of effort, time and planning. Authors need to be reminded of the benefits of blogging from time to time, because they aren't always convinced that someone is reading their blog somewhere in the world.

There’s no magic recipe for hunting down target readers, but lots of evidence in this post proves that blogging increases online visibility as well as sales, and is the hallmark for showcasing one’s expertise.

The strategy itself is simply a combination of deciding on a niche or topic, aligning the content of your posts to suit your chosen topic and niche, and finally, developing a strategy to strengthen your blogging efforts and platform.

Based on tried and true experience, these strategies will help build a following of devoted readers over time:

1. Niche blogging. Your target reader is reading other noteworthy blogs on your topic and perusing forums and threads connected to your topic. That’s why it makes more sense to blog the topics focused on your niche. This is a good way to set yourself apart in such a competitive and crowded writing marketplace. 

2. Strategy for blogging your book. Once you have a clear idea of what your book is about, it’s time to blog it. There are many ways to blog a fiction or non-fiction book. One popular way is to gather a list of themes and lessons that can be supported with excerpts from your book.

For example, the niche topic for my memoir about leaving New York City to serve in the Israel Defense Forces fits in perfectly with transformation type blogs, because of the running theme of courage and leaving one’s comfort zone. One blog post focused on the 7 Courage Scenes that didn’t make the cut for my memoir Accidental Soldier. Another post focused on how to have the courage to make life changes – either extreme or minor.

3. Guest blogging. Once you’ve determined your niche and topics, as well as keywords and brainstormed a list of potential blog posts, the next step is finding guest blogging opportunities. These exist everywhere, but the key is finding the right ones that dovetail with your niche. Like anything, the key is to start small. I gathered six different guest blogging opportunities just by asking on my Facebook wall.

The challenge of course for any author is to maintain consistency over time. How does one stay focused, with patience, faith, self-confident and productive – in short, to “stay the course?” When you have a plan to stay accountable as indicated in the course I’m teaching Blog Your Fiction or Non-Fiction and Reach Your Target Readers, you can in fact, remain focused for the long haul.

***

Dorit Sasson is the founder of the Giving Voice to Your Story website and global radio show. Her mission is to help authors and entrepreneurs give voice to their stories and the powerful messages that lie within their book by blogging as an engaging way to build their platforms. As a memoirist, blogger and copywriter, Dorit models vulnerability and authenticity that help break down barriers and allow others to weave their stories with content. Dorit is a regular contributor to the The Huffington Post. Her cultural memoir, Accidental Solder: What My Service in the Israel Defense Forces Taught Me about Faith, Courage and Love is a heroine's journey of how Dorit was able to find her own voice in a foreign, militaristic society.

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Leave a Comment blogging, blogging your book, Dorit Sasson, guest blogging, niche blogging, online class, targeted readers, WOW Classes