Last week, I had one of the worst client experiences I've had all year. I'd rather not get into the weeds of it here, but I can tell you the word "lawyer" was brought up, and I ended up in tears. The situation has, for the most part, subsided and, as much as possible for now, has been resolved. However, I learned an interesting lesson that I wanted to share.
The day it happened, after responding to the client and attempting to resolve the matter, I stopped checking my personal e-mail and refocused my attention on other responsibilities. In fact, I didn't even think about freelance work the rest of the day. The next day, which happened to be my birthday, I didn't open up my laptop or check my e-mail even once.
I absolutely had to put my mental health first. I even told a couple of pending clients that I wasn't able to accept work until the new year started. The situation that happened rattled me so bad that I was shaking. I can count on one hand the scenarios that have brought me to that point. And so I needed to protect my mental health immediately.
The day after my birthday, I felt brave enough to start work again. But an interesting realization came over me as I played catch up:
I let go of my freelance work for almost two full days. I didn't even worry about checking or responding to e-mails.
And nothing really horrible happened as a result.
Only a few times this year have I let go of my freelance work enough to have some time to myself or to pay attention to non-work matters. Even then, I've either prepared well in advance or done a bit of work to stay on top of things.
But those two days? No work was completed. No emails were responded to. No planning had been done in advance. It was my first official bout of "sick days" as a freelancer.
I've struggled with paying attention to my creative side this year. However, what this bad day taught me was that it's entirely possible to set work aside and focus on non-freelance matters. I hate to think it takes a bad day like this to teach me that lesson, but it did.
Unplugging is possible; it just takes a healthy dose of letting go for it to happen. If you struggle with letting go, here are some tips:
- Plan in advance. Planning can help, but you do have to stay committed to it. I did take some time away this Thanksgiving, for example, but I made sure to wrap things up early and communicate with any clients about time off.
- Stop worrying. There are a few businesses that require an emergency response. My freelance work isn't one of them. These two days, I learned it isn't a terrible thing if I don't respond to an email right away. If you struggle with not responding, consider disconnecting your e-mail from your phone while you're away.
- Tell people in your life. I told my mom that I was disconnecting from work for those two days. It helped because I stayed accountable to someone other than me. Tell people around you that you plan to disconnect. Make sure they know they can call you out if you start working again.
- Plan your future work schedule. If you are taking any number of days off, make a list of what needs to be done on the day you return. This helped me let go. It stopped me from constantly running a to-do list through my head and feeling guilty.
Taking sick days or vacation days as a freelancer is hard. We don't typically have a backup person to reply to e-mail or cover our desk when we're gone. However, it is possible. I learned this through an unusually tough lesson. And maybe I can take it as an opportunity to set freelance work aside and explore my creative self more often.
Nicole Pyles is a writer living in Portland, Oregon. Her writing has appeared in Sky Island Journal, Arlington Literary Journal, The Voices Project, The Ocotillo Review, and Gold Man Review. A poem of hers was also featured in the anthology DEAR LEADERS TALES. Her short story, “The Mannequin of Lot 18,” was nominated for Best American Science Fiction and Fantasy for 2024. Since she’s not active on social media very much, stay in touch by following her writing blog at World of My Imagination.
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