This Holiday Season--Listen to that Still, Small Voice

My partner and I were out running errands when I stopped to admire a display of ceramic Santa Planters each with a baby pine tree (it was the trees that caught my attention—I’m a sucker for anything “baby”).

On cue he said “You should get one.”

As always I shot back, “Naw, that’s okay.”

We loaded the car and he walked off to return the cart. Just as I began to wonder where he’d run off to the door opened and he tossed me a bag—yep, the Santa Planter. Later that night he pointed out to me that every time my inner child reaches for something I slap her hands.

Has anyone ever handed you truth jerky—something you end up chewing on for a long time? For two days now I’ve been getting flashes of how I short change this little girl. I tell myself I’m giving her attention when we work on our “fun” writing projects or when we make gifts for others. After all, this is play—right? Not really. To my inner child this is like hiding vegetables in the Jell-O and calling it dessert.

Oh, my friend also said that if I keep refusing to give my inner child some play time at some point she will throw a tantrum and decide to go play whether I agree or not. I’m not sure what this would look like and I don’t think I want to find out.

As women we train ourselves to “get it done,” “do it perfect,” and “give unto others.” We repeatedly discuss how to fit “more” into 24 hours. Then the holiday season comes and in addition to our work/home/kids/care giving duties we add extra assignments, faster turn-arounds, holiday menus, shopping, and charitable causes. Does anyone else hear “Pop Goes the Weasel”? Something has to give…

This holiday season take a moment to give back...to yourself! Your inner child knows this is a festive time and she wants to play on her terms. So take a moment—right now is good—and ask that little girl what she would like to do for fun. Maybe she wants a cup of hot cocoa this morning. She might want to draw a picture. Heck, maybe the kid wants a Pillow Pet! Let her have it, she’s earned it!

For all the times she’s stayed up late working while others slept. For all the times she’s given up her piece of cake to make someone else happy. For all the times she’s quietly sucked it up when you broke yet another promise to her. Before the year ends set aside some special time with the one person who keeps your creative clock running—that spritely, joyful, playful spirit inside of you.

post & image by Robyn Chausse

What is your inner child asking for? Share it here…

Read More »

10 comments finding balance, fun, inner child, stress management, This Holiday Season Listen to that Still Small Voice, time management, workload

Sink, Swim, or Fly?

What do you do when your to-do list is longer than your intestinal tract? When the amount of work on your plate is so heavy you feel like you need a catering cart?

Sometimes we sink

It's easy to sink when you're drowning in work. I tend to get overwhelmed, and even downright depressed, when too much is put on my plate. When that happens, I fall into a workload coma, unable to complete the task at hand because I'm thinking about the task ahead. I watch TV, check email, and do a million little things that don't help me get closer to accomplishing anything--all the while feeling I've lost my passion for work. When that happens, you know you need to change something. But what do other people do? I found some advice on several forums somewhat amusing:

"I do a pajama day or throw a pajama party, if I can."

"Maybe take a shower, if that's important to you."

"Listen to soundtracks and eat Chinese food."

"Cry. Wallow in self-pity."

So, the internet may not be the best place to find advice, LOL. But I do get what they're saying. It may be necessary to fly, to escape from your problems for a while and clear your mind.

Sometimes we fly

Last weekend, I escaped to one of my favorite places in the mountains--a sleepy little town called Idyllwild, located in the San Jacinto National Forest. There's a cabin I rent every so often, nestled deep in the woods, where cell phone service and the internet are not an option. Unplugging for a couple of days was such a relief! I woke up to fresh air and a bunch of animals that were practically everywhere--a woodpecker storing nuts in a tree for the winter, bunny rabbits casually eating young blades of grass, and fluffy-tailed squirrels literally going nuts foraging for food. That doesn't happen where I live, and it was nice.

If things get too overwhelming to the point where you can't function, you definitely need a break. Don't consider it a sign of weakness. I know, as women, we tend to think we can handle it all. We are the ultimate multitaskers. But if you are overwhelmed, it's not time to multitask. That will only put you in deeper.

So, like the forum posters, if having a pajama party, taking an important shower, listening to soundtracks and eating Chinese food, or crying is your thing...then go ahead. Well, I don't know about the crying and self-pity thing...that seems counterproductive, but you get the idea. Take a walk, read a good book, retreat to a place you love, take some time off and recharge your batteries.

It doesn't matter if you don't have a lot of money, you can find something that will relieve stress. The whole trip to the mountains only cost me a couple hundred dollars. The cabin ran around $98 a night--super cheap for a whole cabin with a full kitchen, two bedrooms, a deck with a BBQ, and a pool. I brought food from home, barbequed, meditated, and read books by the pool. It was inexpensive and just what I needed.

One thing I do regret: the trip was too short. Be sure to take enough time to fully recharge. Then you can come back refreshed and ready to swim.

Sometimes we swim

When you are ready to swim, remember, you are not alone. If you seriously have too much work on your plate, ask for help. Don't be a martyr. Most likely, there are people around you who can help take some of the burden off of your chest. You just have to take time to delegate some of the responsibilities. It could be family members, coworkers, or putting a call out on a writer's group. There are so many people willing to help out in a time of need. Don't think of it as selfish. I know it's a terribly hard thing to grasp, and I battle with that myself, but, if you are doing something good for others, or yourself, it's worth the effort. Flying solo will only hinder your goals and hurt the people around you. So, to do this, ask yourself these questions:

What can I do to lighten my workload?
Examine your to-do list. Is there anything unnecessary? What can you eliminate?

Are there any tasks I can have someone help me with?
Many times we think, I'll just do it, it'll take too much time to explain to someone else, but that's the wrong way to think. Working with someone not only reduces stress, but also helps motivate you to do a better job.

Now, I want to know: What do you do when you are overwhelmed? Do you sink, swim, or fly?

Read More »

3 comments multitask, overwhelmed, sink or swim, to do list, too much work, workload