What if? What if I had said yes to that opportunity? What if I had been willing to take that risk? Those questions plague most of us. Right now, I'm at a fork. Like the song by the Clash, should I stay or should I go? Should I stay, mired in my routine... or should I go off in a new direction with a couple of friends?
Currently, I have a fragmented life. My writing has left me stuck on the side of the road, in a ditch. My teaching has shifted to working with graduate students, like it does every summer. My college teaching is easy, and reenergizes me, so it's in no way problematic. There's things in my personal life that need smoothing over. Here's where the stay or go part comes in...
A couple of friends have an idea of taking a simple, once-a-year storytelling event, and expanding upon it. They're talking about something (a platform? a website? something that can be subscribed to, for sure) that would be a leap for all three of us. However, my mind is already whirling.
On this platform/website, we could have podcasts. Vodcasts. Themed sets of storytelling sessions. Mini workshops. The possibilities are endless. I have a dear friend who lost her daughter, son-in-law and baby granddaughter in a horrific way, due to postpartum psychosis. I could chat with her in a vodcast, and shed some light on that form of mental illness. I'm adopted. My half-sister is adopted. I know people who are birth parents. I have a friend who adopted two handsome young boys. A vodcast/podcast (or two... or three) could focus on different adoption perspectives. Also, I'd love the chance to share some of the great writing ideas other people have gifted to me. My brain is getting dizzy... but sometimes, dizzy is good.
Yes, it would require extra work. And yes, it would require all three of us to dive into waters of unknown depth. There's so many things we'd have to learn. We'd stumble. But what if this endeavor evolves into something magical? What if? What if I say no... and years later, I wonder? And regret.
I have a writing friend, Renee Roberson. She is obsessed with true crime stories. She frothed at the mouth and pinched herself, thinking it was too good to be true when she got to go to MurderCon, a writing conference that focused on crime. (Her favorite workshop session was "Buried Bodies." That sounds like the perfect class to attend right before bedtime ;) Renee has a lulling, hypnotic voice, writing talent oozing out of her ears, and she had a dream.
What if she started her own podcast? Would she have an audience? She had no experience doing podcasts. Would she fall flat on her face?
Thankfully, Renee took the leap. Her podcast, Missing in the Carolinas, is incredible. Her love of true crime, combined with her writing talent and her wonderful voice, converged in a phenomenal way.
I am not thinking that if Renee can do it, so can I, because my knowledge of technology is 157% less than hers. (Yes, I know a little about math, and that is not an incorrect percentage.) However, I look at the leap she made, the courage she had... and perhaps I can jump into something new--as long as I can hold hands with a couple of other newbies.
How about you? Did you have the chance to dream big? If so, how did it end up?
About-to-make-the-move Sioux wants to know.
Sioux Roslawski is middle school teacher, a National Writing Project teacher-consultant, a freelance writer, and the uber proud author of Greenwood Gone: Henry's Story. In her spare time, she rescues dogs for Love a Golden. You can see more of Sioux by checking out her blog.