What a great way to ruin a perfectly wonderful day - with people!
I didn't say ALL people, so don't get all upset right away. I'm not talking about YOU - I'm talking about THOSE people who have nothing nice to say. The people who share their negative thoughts and opinions with anyone who will listen. The people who make themselves feel better by putting others down. You've met them, right?
There's a fabulous movement on social media (at least in my feed - with all my wonderful uplifting and supportive mommy friends) to #weartheswimsuit . IF you don't believe me, just type in that hashtag on any social media outlet and you'll find pictures of all sorts of awesome bodes wearing swimsuits.
Are you done checking those out?
Great - now let's get back on track.
When you're writing, do you worry about what the reader will think of the story? What you neighbors will think about the characters? Do you worry you made a character a little to much like __________ and maybe they'll be offended?
Not a writer ? It's okay - imagine you're going to the beach... do you worry about what you will wear and what others might think?
The truth is, each and every day, we as human beings worry about the opinions of others. We worry our mom friends are better mothers and they may not agree with the sugary snack our children are enjoying while theirs munch on carrots. We worry our healthy friends may not appreciate how rushed we were and how we broke our green eating streak with a trip through the McDonald's drive through. We worry our spouse is gonna see the cellulite that just won't go away on our 40 year old thighs and somehow think less of us. We worry our children are going to think we are uncool.
I'm writing this article and as I'm giving you advice not to worry about what other people think, I'm worrying what you're going to think. How ridiculous am I?
Not ridiculous at all - I'm just human. We aren't all that different you know?
Here's what I want you to do. I'm going to do it too. Let's do this together. Next time we find ourselves worrying about what other people think, let's give this a try:
1) Take a deep breath as we recognize where our head is going.
2) Exhale and ask ourselves "what does it matter?"
3) Take a deep breath and say: "I matter. My opinion and feelings matter. What do I think?"
4) Take a few moments to reflect on our own thoughts instead of the opinions of others.
- is my writing adding value to the story?
- is this character as deep as they should be?
- how do I feel about this?
- does this make me feel fulfilled?
5) Move forward hearing our own voice. The more often we practice this exercise, the stronger our inner voice becomes. The stronger our voice is, the less we hear the 'noise' created by friends, society, the media, etc...
Do you have a story to tell? Don't worry about what others have to say - tune them out and tell your story!
Do you long to wear a bikini and feel the sun on your tummy? Don't worry about what others might say or think - tune them out and put on the bikini!
Leave a comment of something you've done without worrying about what other people think! Leave a comment of something you're GOING to do today without worrying about what other people think!
I can't wait to hear from you! I'll be over here in my bikini (with no make up on) reading my friend Jenn's latest book. She's doing the things. I'm doing the things. Now it's your turn - DO IT!!!!
About Today's Blogger: Crystal is a Blog Tour Manager with WOW! Women on Writing and a busy mom and dairy farmer from Wisconsin. In her spare time she enjoys riding horses, the smell of fresh cut grass, and the feeling of the sun on her tummy! She turned 44 this week and encourages people of all ages, shapes, sizes, and colors to be fearless and brave!
Thanks, Crystal, for sharing those words. I'm from Wisconsin and had a mom who never stopped worrying about what "they" would think. Time to leave that behind!ReplyDelete
I enjoy your blog. Keep writing.
Like Amber, my mother always worried what other people would think. I've probably gotten over it just a little too well. Do not comment on the grey in my hair, the peacock polish on my toe nails or the fact that my chubby butt is wearing leggings unless you want to hear what I think.ReplyDelete
I've realized that the people who would be offended by my writing either aren't going to read it OR are going to be offended whether or not they read it. Even family is going to read the one piece out of 30 that REALLY interests them. They'll ignore everything else.