Annette Fix: Author of The Break-Up Diet: A Memoir Launches her Blog Tour!

The Muffin welcomes Annette, Senior Editor of WOW! Women On Writing, on the first stop of her blog tour! I’m happy to have the chance to talk with her about her humorous and gut-wrenching debut book—The Break-Up Diet: A Memoir.

The Break-Up Diet: A Memoir is the candid and intimate story of a 30-something single mother and aspiring writer who is working as an exotic dancer, searching for Prince Charming, and trying to find the perfect balance between her dreams and her day-to-day life as Supermom.

This debut author's quirky voice and her fairytale experience provide a true alternative to chick-lit fiction as she shares the humor and pathos that accompany heartbreak and seeking the road to happiness.

***Ladies, Annette will be happy to answer any questions about her book, relationships, or memoir writing as well as respond to comments. Anyone leaving a comment or question will be entered into a drawing to win a copy of The Break-Up Diet: A Memoir.

WOW: Welcome, Annette, thanks for launching your blog tour on The Muffin. Your memoir shares a lot of personal, honest, and gut-wrenching moments with readers. How have they responded to your honest portrayal of a break up?

Annette: My readers have been great! So many of the women say that after reading The Break-Up Diet, they feel like we’re friends—especially those I’ve met in-person at book signings and fairs. We end up chatting for hours about relationships. At least a couple times a week, I receive email updates telling me what’s going on in their romantic lives. I think sharing candid stories about lost love tends to form a common bond. I don’t think I could ever become an “ivory tower” writer who is unreachable. I enjoy connecting with readers too much.

WOW: That is so great that your readers are feeling a personal connection with you. I think almost every woman can really relate to some of the dating experiences that you had. It definitely takes another woman to understand those experiences! What was the most difficult scene for you to write?

Annette: I think “5 Hours in Purgatory”—when my ex came to pick up his personal belongings from our shared house--was probably the most difficult scene to write. I began writing the book soon after the break-up—within a week or so—and that meant I had to re-live the scenes on the page while they were still so raw and immediate. There were times while I was writing that I was crying so hard I couldn’t see my computer monitor. If anyone were there to witness it, I’m sure it would’ve looked like the scene in Something’s Gotta Give where Diane Keaton is wailing and typing at the same time.

In hindsight, that image is funny, but I think still being in that emotional place really helped me capture the intense, visceral feelings and translate them into words on the page.

WOW: Yes, your words are so real and do express such strong emotion. There were times when I teared up while I was reading the book. I know what a wonderful, bright person you are, and I just didn't want to see you go through such a terrible time! But I had to keep reading to the end to find out what happened. You had me hooked! So, what are you most afraid to have readers, friends, and family discover about you and your break-up, if anything?

Annette: I’m completely naked in my memoir—emotionally, and sometimes even physically. (laughs) And I’ve actually joked with my in-laws and told them they’re not allowed to read my book. But, honestly, I don’t have any regrets and won’t make excuses to anyone for choices I’ve made or things I’ve done. I am who I am. And there’s a certain amount of fearlessness that comes along with that attitude. I refuse to pretend I’m perfect. There is a lot of freedom from feeling guilty or worrying about being judged when you own your choices.

WOW: I think those are important things women can really learn from your book--to make choices and stick with them--and especially that none of us are perfect! :) Even though most of the book is about a very difficult emotional time in your life, I found myself often laughing out loud at some of your thoughts about the dating scene! Did you make a conscious effort to include humor in your book?

Annette: It wasn’t a conscious effort. Anyone who has spent time with me, on a personal rather than professional level, knows I have a sarcastic streak and a quirky view of life. And, as part of my sense of humor, I love coining colorful phrases that make me laugh. It’s a bonus if it makes other people laugh, too. My friends who’ve read The Break-Up Diet say it “sounds” exactly like me.

I think the offbeat humor lightens the emotional weight that goes along with grieving over lost love and yearning to find a soul mate. And it helps put everything in perspective when I can find something in my life to laugh about!

WOW: The voice in your book is so real. The humor is never forced, and it does help "lighten" such an emotional topic. Do you feel like your book could or does change the way women look at relationships? Why?

Annette: I don’t consider my memoir a life-altering, self-help relationship book; it’s just my story. More than anything, I hope after reading it, women come away with a feeling that it’s okay to believe in happily-ever-after, it’s okay to want the fairytale—the loving mate who is not perfect but is a perfect match for them. And that they understand that having exactly what they want in life really can happen. That’s the whole point of me sharing my story.

Because of my personal situation at the time (single mother/aspiring writer/exotic dancer), I was the least likely person to be in a position to find relationship happiness. But, even after a devastating break-up, I never gave up on that possibility. It’s far too easy to settle. Women do it every day in big and small ways, in relationships, and other aspects of their lives. My one wish would be that women realize it doesn’t have to be that way.

WOW: Those are words of wisdom, Annette! "It's far too easy to settle. . . My one wish would be that women realize it doesn't have to be that way." I know so many women who could really benefit from realizing this, and I'm so glad you wrote your book to share this message with the world! What has been your best experience or best reader response since you have published your book?

Annette: I’ve had so many wonderful responses. But, I’d say my favorite was a reader who emailed to say she keeps my book on the nightstand beside her bed with Angela Bassett’s book (Friends: A Love Story) and the Bible. After I joked that I hope she doesn’t get struck by lightning from having my book too close to the Bible, she said, “Your memoir gives me hope.”
That was incredibly humbling, and it really gave me a sense of joy that my message touched her. For a writer, it doesn’t get any better than that.

WOW: Thanks for sharing your story with us. We are so glad you joined us today, Annette. Ladies, please check out Annette’s websites: http://www.thebreak-updiet.com/ and http://www.annettefix.com/.

To purchase a copy of The Break-Up Diet: A Memoir, go to: Amazon.com or your local independent or chain bookstore.

If you would like to read more about Annette’s publishing journey, check out Angela’s interview with her on WOW! http://www.wow-womenonwriting.com/18-FE3-AnnetteFix.html

Stop by and comment at any (or all!) of the blogs on her tour:

Feb 6 @ Hell or High Water - Topic: Memoir Writing
http://hellorhighwaterwriter.blogspot.com/

Feb 9 @ The Virtual Wordsmith - Topic: Independent Publishing
http://virtualwordsmith.blogspot.com

Feb 11 @ Reading, Writing, & Stuff that Makes Me Crazy - Topic: Book Promotion
http://www.reading-writing.blogspot.com/

Feb 12 @ Bookish Mom - Topic: Memoir Writing
http://www.bookishmom.blogspot.com/

Feb 13 @ The Daily Blonde - Topic: Relationships
http://dailyblonde.blogspot.com/

Feb 16 @ The Urban Muse - Topic: Memoir writing
http://www.urbanmusewriter.com/

Feb 17 @ Confessions of a Book-A-Holic - Topic: Interview about The Break-Up Diet: A Memoir
http://stephaniesbooks.blogspot.com/

Feb 18 @ Momma Said - Topic: Q&A about The Break-Up Diet: A Memoir and “Housewife Awards” Story Contest & Book Give-Away
http://www.mommasaid.net/index.aspx

Feb 20 @ Day By Day Writer - Topic: Balancing writing and life
http://daybydaywriter.wordpress.com

Feb 23 @ MomECentric - Topic: Following your dreams
http://www.momecentric.com

Feb 26 @ A Blonde and Her Blog - Topic: Homeschooling
http://ablondeandherblog.blogspot.com/

Feb 27 @ Sybil Baker.com - Topic: Interview about the Writing Process
http://sybilbaker.blogspot.com/

Feb 28 @ Clever Girl Goes Blog - Topic: Q&A about The Break-Up Diet: A Memoir
http://www.clevergirlgoesblog.com/

Mar 2 @ Betty Confidential - Topic: Relationship Break-Up Stories Contest & Book Give-Away
http://www.bettyconfidential.com/

Interview by Margo Dill, http://www.margodill.com/, http://margodill.com/blog/